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changes Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

Life = love + life

The Life, Love, and Leveling Up of an individuals
For most of us, it’s no secret that love conquers all. It makes life worth living—and it even lights up those dark corners of our hearts. But for those who are experiencing a difficult time in their relationship, the difficulties might be just what the doctor ordered — and not the end of the world. The truth is, most relationships don’t pan out as planned. And for those who do have a successful outcome, it’s often because they weren’t meant to be. In this article, we explore the six pillars of love: what they are and how to cultivate them in your life.

What is love?
Simply put, love is a feeling. It’s not a word, a concept, or even a thought. It’s an action. And the action is to connect with the one you love, no matter who that person is — whether that person is your spouse, your best friend, or your colleague. It’s to make space for them in your heart, mind, and calendar.

How to have love
To have love, you must have love. That’s it. That’s the entire situation. You don’t have to do anything else. It doesn’t matter if you spend your free time alone or with a partner — the very fact that you’re connected to another person makes you feel love.

Why do people have love?
There are two main factors that lead to the development of love. The first is mutual respect for one another. This is the foundation of any relationship. If someone doesn’t respect you — or, at the very least, doesn’t seem to appreciate what you have — then there’s no chance in hell of having love.

How to cultivate it in your life
There are a few ways to get your heart rate pumping and your mind thinking like an individual. It starts by choosing to love yourself first. Once you’ve validated that you are healthy and happy — then, it’s on to the question of how to love your partner. Here are a few ways to start: Express your love for yourself. Create a photo album with your love for yourself. Share it with anyone who’ll listen. Get involved in extracurricular activities or charitable causes that support your interests. Whatever it takes, make yourself happy. Improve your relationship with your partner. Spend more time together; read, write, and interact with each other; be more sensitive to one another’s needs; and show up more as a team.

Bottom line
Now that you’ve explored the six pillars of love, what are you waiting for? Start being you! When someone doesn’t love you back, it automatically suggests that they don’t want to be with you. That means it — and the challenges that come with it — are real. You’re not alone. The people in your life who struggle are the ones who need to connect with themselves and validate that they love themselves. Keep in mind that it’s okay to be imperfect — because being imperfect is who you are. And while you may feel bad for the way that you feel sometimes, it doesn’t mean that you have to put up with unfair or negative treatment from other people. In fact, that kind of behavior towards others can lead to feelings of inadequacy and self-blame. So, instead of feeling shame or shamefacedness, just realize that you’re just naturally attracted to those who you think have what you want in life — and who you think you can please. The more you connect with yourself and validate that you love yourself, the easier it will be for you to connect with your partner. Eventually, something will grow between you two and you’ll know you’re meant to be together.

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Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

who will stand

We living in a world where we get to hear new things been invented everyday a world where people don’t like to seem out of date a world where technology has taken much of everything a world we really don’t know this is ending a world where people get to live life forgetting that there are children to stand for in time to come

have you sit down and ask yourself one day that “WHAT PARENT WILL I MAKE?”

one day when I was in the sitting room was talking to my mom and she told me “you have to live in peace with your siblings,love them take good care of them, you are like a mother to them when am gone there eyes will be on you so you need to he good too and strong and a person who sees beyond”, these words made me think of something, probably you who is reading this you are a parent already or maybe parent to be or maybe you in plans of becoming one this is for you. So my thought were,

i am where I am now because my mom stood for me, prayed for me taught be and raised me by the Bible’s words. She never got tired praying, kneeling and crying just to pray for m, she never stopped talking and yelling and warn me by the word that this is bad and that this stop that do this don’t do that to become a better person. And here I am now it’s not by my own strength nor will but the prayers that I was prayed for and the teaching I was raised by . Now let’s get back to today, the lives we living the way things go, are we really in position to be better parents for them who are coming? It’s terrifying really, most of parents right now got no time with their children most of parents right now are too much into social media and all that technology has brought forgetting that they need time to stay with their children and teach them and warn them to make them good later. Nowadays a kid do something wrong and a parent will just take a look at him or her and be like “ah that’s how the kid is” really!! Are you just gonna stand and watch yo kid going astray and have nothing to do for him or her ?

What generation are making or are going to make, who will stand for them if only we can’t even stand for us, Let it not reach the time in the Bible where it will come a generation which won’t know God. Parents, parents to be and the upcoming we have to look out our ways we have to remember how we were raised not just because it’s a globalized world then we forget all about how we were taught and raised, yes there are things or ways used that were not appropriate just see how you can modify and help your child or children. We need to stand for them to be better, better than us.

If we won’t stand for them who will?

Bless up

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changes knowledge life mentality and mental health

Our Escape

Well the dictionary define escape as a narrow run or temporary displacement or distraction from a routine or reality.

The definition had something that caught my eye, the words such as temporary, distraction and reality.

We tend to search for escapes because of our temporary situation in life, and life can be a constituent of many things from social interaction to the mind of one self. Our economy, social life, spirituality, mentality, health and even a balance of all these can be what we call life..

Escape is temporary just as noted from the definition before, reason to create escape can vary but alot of people are in search of escape to get a way to numb pain, and the pain is mostly caused by over expectations.

See in life we tend to expect alot from people or even actions that we do. We expect fast money so we engage in illegal businesses to make quick money and we end up disappointed for a reason or two. We are always constantly putting overwhelming hopes forward and casting out reality in the name of faith.

Don’t quote me wrong, faith is a good thing but don’t disguise instant gratification or any thing related to fastering the process as faith, TRUST THE PROCESS they say but people don’t do that, the say maybe the process should start trusting their ways.

A failure to quit running towards escape will lead to addiction, and we all know what addictions do to a person. And there is no such thing as a good or bad addictions.

Addictions are addictions and people tend to color coat it because they are temporary pleasures that leads to an escape of reality..

Once posted it on our team timeline ” what’s your escape ?” And the response were alot, but people are troubled with alot that we have to agree to, but some problem they are not really a running problem, some problem are to be faced, but it’s easy to think on running more than thinking of facing it..

On a advisory scale, problems will constantly seem to add up and piling up problems will not be the solution. We have to fight our problems, the escape to our problems  doesn’t solve the problems they just forward them. So we are not running away from them we are just forwarding them…

Bless Up
Emitty

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changes Constructive thinking knowledge mentality and mental health season

Purposely Placed

I don’t know how to put this but before, when what I was seeking was social approval, instant gratification and peace from people around, life was tough, how?

Before we head there, ” let me place this what determines your peace determines your sadness and your level of disappointment – Pst Steven Furtick” In simple words where you place your happiness is where disappointment happens and also source of problems.

If it go cost my peace its an expensive shit don’t disturb me please ( I don’t know if I have captured it fresh but its from Adekunle Gold)

Back to the main story, I was easily moved to different spots, I used the same methods as they used some people before me to be gratify by the society or approved. I was so in pain when a person could outbeat me in something and I was super competitive just to be seen I’m present. I would have do anything just to be seen in a room full of People.

But have come to realise that when you’re not place to do something you’ll never find peace in what you do, disappointments will always be your portion.

Am I there yet no, why am I sharing then if am not there it’s just have come to learn you have to be open, to know that what you will always do no matter what scale it’s there will be a person doing bigger than you but yours is unique just because its done by you.

Never compare you with someone else and just know the aim of you is to have peace inside and not social gratification, that’s the main key keep that.

For there is a great reward in what you do alone and satisfied from inside than what you do and satisfy the societies around us. There is a great cost to satisfy a society than to satisfy yourself

Bless Up
Emitty

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

As He teaches

Back in my primary school I remember my grammar school teacher usually had us Energize with some opposites of words.

He would have the class stand up and pick one at random then he starts by saying you what is the opposite of this and that and you’ll earn a seat when you answer the questions

Well back then we hated it and we usually didn’t raise our hands to answer the questions hoping the teacher will get bored and run out of words to ask us. But ooh boy that man had stamina he was always on the clock and he had alot of words for us to answer

So right now I don’t use any opposite in my life or neither do i use the grammar 100% but what I know today i can reflect in alot of lessons that can be derived from the quick stand up.

Some notable guidelines to some lessons are as follow.
1. Expecting the teacher to come and ask questions. See in life we are always in a surprise mode, but so far people are in a stage they even say for the point that life has thrown so much shades on me I can’t be surprised no more. This is not that s/he has gone through it all but it’s that s/he has gone through alot . Alot people of have a hidden story to tell. And all the stories mah all have a same beginning “it was out of no were, I didn’t plan this or I didn’t plan that but it happens and till it happens like that it means that if you didn’t plan for it then you had a different plan and that the opposite happened…
2. Our response some early they raise their hands but some of us we dont. The early response are similar to the way we live our lives some opportunities are randomly popin up always but its some few that make that fast decision and others will take time to take them but others will not take the opportunities at all that’s life. We waited for the teacher but some of us had already sat down earlier…
3. Hope and expectation for him to get bored. I really dont know if this has ever hit you up, you starting feeling a little left out want to life just pass you by, feeling like you’re the only one alone in this whole life passing a certain situation and life cant Get any worse than it was. You hope life will get bored and start being nice to you? If you’re in this just know life never get bored throwing shade its just mother nature making us hard and resilient to its methods.
4. Stamina for his consistency,life will always show you consistency more and more and it will always disappoint us, so life has the teacher’s consistency to throw shades. There is a trending statement good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people that’s nature the way to build the boldness out of ourselves.
5. Answers given. Whether we were asked the first round or last every question that the teacher had asked had answers so as life no matter what you going through, nonmatter tough,easy, crazy, logical or illogical then just know, no matter what time is threw at you it has an answer..
6. Topic on the table. The teacher had always had a particular theme he used while asking a question and we would have to tune ourselves into answering the particular theme that was very easy simply because the questions were easily predictable after the theme was known. So in life trying figure what wave to flow with in times of your greatest conflict..

I was told a good teacher teaches how the real world works on his lessons without even saying so, and by reflecting this it has clearly shown me that the teacher planted something positive in the lessons he taught..

Bless up
Emitty

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graduate's depression knowledge life mentality and mental health season

Chillax,Graduate (parte v)

Will start today’s article with my all time fave hindi movie namely three idiots, when the imperial college principle was addressing the students, he said life is a race, you either run or get squashed.

That statement applies to us but for today am not talking about running and talking about tolerance, life is a race yea but if you live in daressalaam you it’s not a race. This is because there will always be a traffic jam some place always.

Am not from there but we usually see and hear of traffic jams and so on. So in traffic jams is where I would like to set my theme for today’s title tolerance. In life is not all about running but it’s about maintaining pace between what you had, who you are and who you want to be.

See the same person has a past, present and future now tolerance is how you live now with learnt experience of the past making or creating a better future that’s tolerance.

Am not conflict with the one who said the past is past or bygones be bygones what am saying is that let all the past be a learnt experience which will help you make moves today that are not from scratch but from a reference that will help you reach point in the future.

In a traffic jam there is always a slow/gradual movement towards the common place, in life that’s how we are some people maybe going fast in the route and you going slow it doesn’t matter what matters is your tolerance to wait to finish because even after the jam what’s next is a smooth ride to compensate wasted time…

Learn to take time and tolerate what is thrown at you..

Bless up
Emitty..

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changes graduate's depression life mentality and mental health

Chillax,Graduate. (Parte II)

We live in a world were everything is memelized, a world were everyone is a meme lord or meme queen, it’s not a bad thing. So why am i bringing this to your attention.

It fits the illustrations for parte II of the 2021 graduate depression, some memes are funny but explain everything in plain language and fewer words. I wish I could show you all memes have seen but just take a few.

One in a particular occasion if I remember said relax life is too short to commit suicide we all die. With relation to graduate depression, it’s very easy for a graduate nowadays to run to commit suicide just because of impatience.

We seek instant gratification, some memes show some skeletons and it will be seen written at age of 25 a graduate places himself/herself stating I will have a job, and house with a car, while the skeletons playing the role of ancestors. ( I recalled the story of the old man and the bamboo tree plantation that took 5years to just come out of the ground.)

What makes us depressed is hoping or finishing school and hopping everything falls in place just as we get out, to some it does happen like that but a larger number it doesn’t come out like that..

What also makes us depressed is too much thinking of what tomorrow holds ” nothing eats us more than think of tomorrow, the thinking of tomorrow is fine but overthinking robs us of the present.” Most of graduates end up messing up the last semester because their minds are all set for the end but they forget that they can’t have tomorrow perfectly if they dont have a best today…

It’s not a meme but I was in class somedays back and the lecturer was teaching on the multimedia technologies team, where he said there many people that are always involved in the production of some things, eg movies and even animations.

A student raised a voice and said what is wrong with our side, multimedia products why are they so poor in production is it the team problem.

The lecturer answered the point is and will always be the same reasons across our nation, we seek instant gratification over quality work we find want to be in the market with alot of poor works instead of having a perfect work speaking and branding us. The works are alot in the market but they just shout nothing to offer

He continued by saying why do we eat ugali, rice and boiled vegetables its because we hate waiting and the habit has brought us impatience that it’s either we can’t see something through or we fast forward it.

Its always been the logical universal rule, good things takes time . If you fail to enjoy the process you are doomed to depress over slow motion of your progress.

Coming up next on part III: Comparison, company and tolerance

Part II
Bless up
Emitty

Categories
Constructive thinking life mentality and mental health season

Pa…

Apart from today being Father’s Day, I had in me to write this article after watching “breakthrough” a movie about the powerful prayer of a parent.

Also I write this because of the nickname Baba Mzazi that I recently found myself been given.

Being a father or a Male parent is never easy neither being a mother but a father is a figure that has a different point of being viewed.

This article can’t be expressed only by a single person but since its my version. What scares me most about being a father is ?

I know time will reach and I’ll be a father, having kids is a fantastic dream but is also scary that what if the kids dont turn out the way you want? Our fathers or parents nurtured us to the way that we are right now, I’m who I’m now just because they dared to take care and nurture me through this road.

I was a kid back then and I know without a doubt that I was very stubborn growing up and reaching this level definitely I know I was stubborn. No need to be told I was. But they took care of me .

My greatest fear of becoming a father is will my kid keep my teachings, what I will tell him or her also what will I teach her or him? How can I protect my kids around this world of technology with everything you seek being available at my kid’s hand??

If this is your worries then welcome to the team, fathers to be… I haven’t figured the dad ship yet but what I know is that kids are always gonna learn from what they see their parent figure always do. How do I know that this is from me I’m here because I grabbed what my father was doing so the insecurities that comes from you taking care of the kids that you have or going to have all lies on the way you are around them.

” an apple doesn’t fall far from the apple tree.” You are your kids.

In the above statements I haven’t said that being a father is easy I just said it’s easy for kids learning from what they are exposed too.

Being a father is not a part time job or something that you do when you’re free but it’s always being there for the kid you have. Building up memories with them and in the end believing they are grownup enough to be the better version of you. So never teach a kid to be as you but better than you.

Cheers to dads in heaven
Cheers to dads in earth
Cheers to dads to be..
Happy fathers day

Bless up
Emitty

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Swahili Episodes

Mawazo Huru

Watu wanasema mchezo kwa nje ni mrahisi , ila ingia ndani uone au ucheze.

pia kuna ka-msemo kapo kanasema ukikaa kimya utasikia mengi ukiongea utatoa tu yale uyajuayo. Kwenye usafiri wa umma mara nyingi ndipo tunasikiaga vitu vingi na mengine tunajifunza.

sasa Leo nimevutiwa na mada uliyokuwa inaendelea juu ya mifumo ya ajira na elimu, mada hyo ilikuwa inaongelewa huku mimi nikiwa nashauku kubwa ya kusikia na kujifunza na si kusema wala kuchangia.

Raha ya mada hii kila level ya watu iliwakilishwa, wazazi na wanafunzi na wahitimu wasaka ajira.

maoni yao ni kama yafuatayo.
wazazi wanasema kwamba watoto wao wanaondoka wakiwa wadogo na wanarudi nyumbani baada ya muda mrefu wakiwa wamemaliza elimu ya chuo wakiwa wakubwa ila shida wanarudi wanasubiria kuajiriwa. Akaendelea kusema ni bora kungekuwa na masomo ya ujasiriamali katika shule na vyuo vyao hukoo.

(mtazamo wangu ni sawa kuwaza ivyo na vyuo vingi wanafanya kufundisha elimu ya ujasiriamali japo wanafunzi ndo hawana mawazo ya kujiongeza ila juhudi za kujenga akili za kibunifu ni juu ya mwanafunzi. Mwanafunzi akijijenga juu ya connection hapo hatoboi ndo tunapata jamii ya kusubiri mambo yao yaende pasipo mafanikio.)

kwa upande wa wahitimu. wahitimu yapo makundi mawili waliotoka kutoka diploma na degree. sasa wengi wanalalamika ajira mtaani amna na haya yote ni kisa serikali na taasisi ziajirizo hazitoi nafasi, na endapo zitatoa zinataka watu wenye uzoefu wa miaka si chini. ya mitatu kuendelea.

(mtazamo wangu ni kwamba mimi pia nashangazwa na nafasi zitolewazo kudai uzoefu na pia nafasi huwa nyingi, ila wahitimu tunapaswa kuwa wavumilivu ni bora kujenga jina kwa kujitolea pasipo malipo, na pia wengi tunafeli kwa uwoga wa kujaribu kutafuta kazi. wengi kwa uwoga wa kutokuwa wazoefu, embu tujaribu kuomba nafasi halafu tukajitengenezee jina angalau tuweke cv zetu kwenye ofisi zao ili pindi ikitokea nafasi ingine, sura yako si ngeni.

soko la ajira sasa hivi sawa ni gumu na si rahisi kama zamani na tukae tukijua kuwa wazazi wetu au walezi hawajapitia zama za kukosa kazi kihivyo, kipindi chao walikuwa elimu ndogo na kazi zipo. kwa hyo wahitimu wajiandae kisaikolojia kwa kukabiliana na wazazi wao.)

kwa upande wa wanafunzi walioko kwenye maandalizi ya kuingia mtaani. walikuwa wako kimya kwenye mdahalo ila mtazamo wangu ni huu, chuoni ndo sehemu ya kujiconnect na wadau wako. usiache hao marafiki usipoteane hao ndio marafiki watakaokuweka mjini pale unaposaka ajira.

pia usisite kujitolea pale nafasi zinapotokea, kaa vizuri na walimu wako hao ndio watakao kuweka pia mjini , nafasi nyingi zinapitia kwao za kazi pia kuwa na namba zao.)

haya yote ni mawazo huru na ni mawazo yangu ni ruksa kupinga au kurekebisha.

Je ww uko kwa kundi gani kati ya haya tuongee kwenye kiboxi la maoni
. na pia sio kila kitu cha kuchukua katika hili chagua size yako beba fanyia kazi kama yanafaa..

Categories
changes Constructive thinking life season

Sweep In…

Good day to you.  hope this finds you well, after what the world is going through i hope you are holding up good. in times like this is at when our faith and stability is tested be strong and keep the faith up…

This morning after along time at home without doing anything i decided to go outside the yard and try sweeping it up. I know that we all have once or very often sweep the yards

Photo credits: unsplash.com

What I have come to notice is that you can have a portion of yard that is yours and the other can be your neighbors portion and all can be dirty. we can take this act in two portions from the single side view and the other is multiple side view.

SINGLE SIDE VIEW
This view I want you to imagine as the  fallen grass and other waste as the objects that hinders your smile and happiness the baggage that you carry that hinders you to be seen as the real you. sweeping them makes you nourish and grow as the way it should be. Here am talking about the aftermath after the sweep nevertheless take consideration the tools that are used to sweep ( it can be friends and hobbies that keeps up to make sure your form goes back into place, in terms of friends they are ready to sacrifice there wellbeing as the sweep gets worn out just to make sure you’re clean and keep on nourished. This is a great sacrifice and you should acknowledge them because they are always there and ready to sweep you over and over again.  

MULTIPLE SIDE VIEW
The tools (friends that sweep you up when you are full of grudge and other baggages that life throws at you they are there ) just ready to sweep your portion but remember your yard once swept will be clean and the difference between your yard and the next yard close to you will be seen. What am implying is that you were in a situation that you were helped by a friend now its your time not to take their sacrifices for GRANTED  but cherish and you be a sweeping Brush to your neighbor. Never be satisfied just because you’re out of your baggage that doesn’t mean your neighbor should stay that way too..

All in all life is just life and you can’t sweep all the yards out there and also people around you wont be able to sweep all your fallen grasses on you but when you get few people that makes or even just start sweeping you should stand up and be of help to. Help not only to your self but also to the people around you. .

bless up
Emitty…

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