Tag: expectations

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Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health season

A Lil Island

Off the coast of Nova Scotia, Canada, lies a small island known as Oak Island. This unassuming piece of land has been the center of one of the most enduring mysteries in maritime history – the legend of the Money Pit.

According to the tale, in the late 18th century, three young boys discovered a peculiar depression on the island’s surface. Intrigued, they began to dig, and as they delved deeper, they encountered layers of logs and stone markers, leading them to believe that they were on the trail of a buried treasure.

Over the centuries, numerous treasure hunters, including famed explorers and engineers, have attempted to unearth the supposed riches, only to be met with a series of ingenious traps and elaborate flood tunnels. Despite the relentless efforts and significant excavations, the treasure, if it indeed exists, remains tantalizingly out of reach.

The mystery of Oak Island’s Money Pit has sparked the imagination of explorers and enthusiasts for generations, with theories ranging from hidden pirate loot to ancient manuscripts or even connections to the Holy Grail. To this day, the island continues to lure adventurous souls in pursuit of the elusive fortune, making it a captivating and enigmatic chapter in the annals of island lore.

Back to the real concept now, In  life we create a little island, were we isolate ourselves with what goes around us , we just want the noise to be finally over for a short period of time. Not fully shut but just for until we manage to work our way around things.

We set boundaries, standards and guidelines to point out the dos and donts just in order to buy ourselves time to get our shit straight.

See the boundaries and the artifical island ain’t perfect and to some they may feel like we are selfish and we are anti social never knowing what’s really going on..

To some they are well aware of what’s going on and why there is an island but they are the ones who want to take a boat and come this side, sometimes it’s a good trip but some times it’s for a bad cause to just Lower the gap between the waters and the land.

The problem that arise in our lives create isolation and the isolation is the island, we have different ways of accepting the problem at hand. We accept and draw a way to proceed with tackling the problem.

But to others our ways of solving them may be Alittle kinda different from how they will normally tackle it, and this gap between our way of doing versus the way they will do its what causes conflicts and causing us to dry our islands dry. The words spoken cause us to lower our beliefs on solving our problems in our own ways.

Don’t get it twisted, but there’s power in collaborative problem solving and also there is power in adaptive and solo problem solving, see sometimes problems come our way not to be collaboratively solved.

There is a verse from the Good book that says, when temptations come our way, are within our abilities to be solved by us, this statement alone may help when we’re facing problems only when we believe in it .

With problems comes solutions, with solutions comes experiences and with experience comes sucess, let not your way of dealing with problems be messed up just by the words, action or somebody else’s way of solving problems.

Bless up
Emitty …

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changes Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

Life = love + life

The Life, Love, and Leveling Up of an individuals
For most of us, it’s no secret that love conquers all. It makes life worth living—and it even lights up those dark corners of our hearts. But for those who are experiencing a difficult time in their relationship, the difficulties might be just what the doctor ordered — and not the end of the world. The truth is, most relationships don’t pan out as planned. And for those who do have a successful outcome, it’s often because they weren’t meant to be. In this article, we explore the six pillars of love: what they are and how to cultivate them in your life.

What is love?
Simply put, love is a feeling. It’s not a word, a concept, or even a thought. It’s an action. And the action is to connect with the one you love, no matter who that person is — whether that person is your spouse, your best friend, or your colleague. It’s to make space for them in your heart, mind, and calendar.

How to have love
To have love, you must have love. That’s it. That’s the entire situation. You don’t have to do anything else. It doesn’t matter if you spend your free time alone or with a partner — the very fact that you’re connected to another person makes you feel love.

Why do people have love?
There are two main factors that lead to the development of love. The first is mutual respect for one another. This is the foundation of any relationship. If someone doesn’t respect you — or, at the very least, doesn’t seem to appreciate what you have — then there’s no chance in hell of having love.

How to cultivate it in your life
There are a few ways to get your heart rate pumping and your mind thinking like an individual. It starts by choosing to love yourself first. Once you’ve validated that you are healthy and happy — then, it’s on to the question of how to love your partner. Here are a few ways to start: Express your love for yourself. Create a photo album with your love for yourself. Share it with anyone who’ll listen. Get involved in extracurricular activities or charitable causes that support your interests. Whatever it takes, make yourself happy. Improve your relationship with your partner. Spend more time together; read, write, and interact with each other; be more sensitive to one another’s needs; and show up more as a team.

Bottom line
Now that you’ve explored the six pillars of love, what are you waiting for? Start being you! When someone doesn’t love you back, it automatically suggests that they don’t want to be with you. That means it — and the challenges that come with it — are real. You’re not alone. The people in your life who struggle are the ones who need to connect with themselves and validate that they love themselves. Keep in mind that it’s okay to be imperfect — because being imperfect is who you are. And while you may feel bad for the way that you feel sometimes, it doesn’t mean that you have to put up with unfair or negative treatment from other people. In fact, that kind of behavior towards others can lead to feelings of inadequacy and self-blame. So, instead of feeling shame or shamefacedness, just realize that you’re just naturally attracted to those who you think have what you want in life — and who you think you can please. The more you connect with yourself and validate that you love yourself, the easier it will be for you to connect with your partner. Eventually, something will grow between you two and you’ll know you’re meant to be together.

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changes Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

Build or Break

build (/bɪld/)
construct (something) by putting parts or material together.

Similar: construct, erect, put up, assemble, set up, raise, make, fabricate, form, manufacture, create, fashion, model, mould, shape, forge, knock together

Opposite: demolish, destroy,

make stronger or more intense.
“we built up confidence in our abilities”

Similar: boost, strengthen, increase, improve, invigorate, augment, raise, intensify, enhance, escalate, multiply, swell, beef up

the proportions of a person’s or animal’s body.
“she was of medium height and slim build”

Similar: physique, frame, body, figure,form, structure, shape, make-up, formation

All the above is inspired by a line of statement on a very good lovely friend I have, build or break that she wrote on her timeline.

In life we get alot of things that troubles us, I can share what I go through or even If we had a dialogue of what you going through honestly without any secrecy,I know I’ll hear alot from you.

Let’s not talk about that but what you go through can either BUILD or BREAK.

In college, there is an allowance offered by the government to students and most of the students are given the same amount of money for the whole semester. The money comes into two portion.

Most of us we are facing the financial balance difficulties but what makes us going is the fact that there is next time in two months and you’ll get money.

The situation of waiting builds  most of us into a stage of planning and placing of budget so that when the money comes it will be effectively. That’s to most of us

But in life everything may be off balance and everything hitting you may seem new to you and you thinking that everything is after you to break you..

Financial problems, health issues, social troubles,spiritual difficulties and many more these are many in the list of things that can really question  your mentality and make you feel broken. 

They say anything that doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, that’s what we should take out of any situation, we are here not for a smooth life, but to be tested and to know our limits.

Inorder to live and reach the point to know our capabilities we have to undergo the processes that will break us into ways we can’t even understand, but it’s in these situations we learn to build ourselves up better and stronger.

The good book says, no challenge comes to you too heavy for you to handle,  and through every challenge there is an exit. We need to build ourselves through challenges.

For the challenges are there to stay, they can’t go away all by them selves but through solving them. Just like building a LEGO one block at a time, so is the same as tackling challenges one problem at a time..

Bless up
Emitty…

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Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

who will stand

We living in a world where we get to hear new things been invented everyday a world where people don’t like to seem out of date a world where technology has taken much of everything a world we really don’t know this is ending a world where people get to live life forgetting that there are children to stand for in time to come

have you sit down and ask yourself one day that “WHAT PARENT WILL I MAKE?”

one day when I was in the sitting room was talking to my mom and she told me “you have to live in peace with your siblings,love them take good care of them, you are like a mother to them when am gone there eyes will be on you so you need to he good too and strong and a person who sees beyond”, these words made me think of something, probably you who is reading this you are a parent already or maybe parent to be or maybe you in plans of becoming one this is for you. So my thought were,

i am where I am now because my mom stood for me, prayed for me taught be and raised me by the Bible’s words. She never got tired praying, kneeling and crying just to pray for m, she never stopped talking and yelling and warn me by the word that this is bad and that this stop that do this don’t do that to become a better person. And here I am now it’s not by my own strength nor will but the prayers that I was prayed for and the teaching I was raised by . Now let’s get back to today, the lives we living the way things go, are we really in position to be better parents for them who are coming? It’s terrifying really, most of parents right now got no time with their children most of parents right now are too much into social media and all that technology has brought forgetting that they need time to stay with their children and teach them and warn them to make them good later. Nowadays a kid do something wrong and a parent will just take a look at him or her and be like “ah that’s how the kid is” really!! Are you just gonna stand and watch yo kid going astray and have nothing to do for him or her ?

What generation are making or are going to make, who will stand for them if only we can’t even stand for us, Let it not reach the time in the Bible where it will come a generation which won’t know God. Parents, parents to be and the upcoming we have to look out our ways we have to remember how we were raised not just because it’s a globalized world then we forget all about how we were taught and raised, yes there are things or ways used that were not appropriate just see how you can modify and help your child or children. We need to stand for them to be better, better than us.

If we won’t stand for them who will?

Bless up

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changes Constructive thinking knowledge life & sports mentality and mental health

Defined

School life has never been easy to some of us if not all of us,to the rest of us school has been a battleground constantly fighting. Whether for grades or social bonding, it was and still is a fight.

Well the true fight comes on mastering your lecturer or teacher, his or her approaches the likes and the dislikes that’s where things becomes hasty..

Well a short story was, and I know this is common having that one teacher each semester wanting you answering questions just has s/he has teacher a line by line word to word..

Well if he defined something as A you can’t write it as small “a” and expecting to score a mark from him or her. Inorder to pass his or her module we have to abide and go a word to word with what s/he has offered.

In life we face similar situations, I call it playing dumb, we tend to know what’s right and what’s not right but we still find ourselves living line by line and word to word.

In parallel with their definition of what we are, what we should be and even what we should do and how we should behave, and we find it okay thinking that we can’t do anything about it even if we try..

We are scared to break toxic routine just because of what has been predefined on us by others. Well am not a teacher or lecturer to tell you that you need to overcome that.

But just know even in school the best things or knowledge that sticks out in our mind is always the one that we have defined ourselves .

So it’s easier to make a further step forward with our own definition of routine, what we are, who we are and where we are going and at what pace we are moving. We have to refine the definition that are set on us…

Bless up
Emitty

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changes knowledge life mentality and mental health

Our Escape

Well the dictionary define escape as a narrow run or temporary displacement or distraction from a routine or reality.

The definition had something that caught my eye, the words such as temporary, distraction and reality.

We tend to search for escapes because of our temporary situation in life, and life can be a constituent of many things from social interaction to the mind of one self. Our economy, social life, spirituality, mentality, health and even a balance of all these can be what we call life..

Escape is temporary just as noted from the definition before, reason to create escape can vary but alot of people are in search of escape to get a way to numb pain, and the pain is mostly caused by over expectations.

See in life we tend to expect alot from people or even actions that we do. We expect fast money so we engage in illegal businesses to make quick money and we end up disappointed for a reason or two. We are always constantly putting overwhelming hopes forward and casting out reality in the name of faith.

Don’t quote me wrong, faith is a good thing but don’t disguise instant gratification or any thing related to fastering the process as faith, TRUST THE PROCESS they say but people don’t do that, the say maybe the process should start trusting their ways.

A failure to quit running towards escape will lead to addiction, and we all know what addictions do to a person. And there is no such thing as a good or bad addictions.

Addictions are addictions and people tend to color coat it because they are temporary pleasures that leads to an escape of reality..

Once posted it on our team timeline ” what’s your escape ?” And the response were alot, but people are troubled with alot that we have to agree to, but some problem they are not really a running problem, some problem are to be faced, but it’s easy to think on running more than thinking of facing it..

On a advisory scale, problems will constantly seem to add up and piling up problems will not be the solution. We have to fight our problems, the escape to our problems  doesn’t solve the problems they just forward them. So we are not running away from them we are just forwarding them…

Bless Up
Emitty

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

Who’s fault is it

Its another beautiful morning today. I thank God for giving the grace of attending the first service today. So when was on my way back home I was just walking along the road then over a sudden a guy from behind me just greeted, “Hi”. I had to turn back to know who that person was, it was a guy a know, just a guy around the neighborhood and I hied back to him. As we were walking the guy was smoking and I was like it’s so too early for him to be doing this, this was just in my head. So I had to ask him what’s the benefit of that he replied “it has no benefits honestly and I can’t stop smoking ” I was like “ooh really” then he said ” I got this friends of mine who taught me how to but I now wonder that they ain’t smoking anymore” and I told him so why can’t you stop and be just like them “No I can’t stop I just can’t” , do you know how bad it is for your health especially your lungs “Yes, nicotine I what I get from this and I can’t stop, it’s satan who is making me” and I was like whoa whoa whoa man hold it there satan! Are you for real? so Satan is the one who made you do this. You know you really don’t have to blame Satan in any of this because you are the who made such a decision to get to where you are now and to what you are doing right now

What am I trying to say here is

many of us have been blaming satan for the mistakes we do or for situations we get ourselves in and we be like it’s satan who made me do this on the contrary it’s been our fault all way long we get to decide without thinking of what the outcome would be. So sometimes we just have seat and look back to where we made it go wrong and get to fix it than just saying the statement it’s Satan who made me do this

You have a great day. Bless up

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge mentality and mental health season

Purposely Placed

I don’t know how to put this but before, when what I was seeking was social approval, instant gratification and peace from people around, life was tough, how?

Before we head there, ” let me place this what determines your peace determines your sadness and your level of disappointment – Pst Steven Furtick” In simple words where you place your happiness is where disappointment happens and also source of problems.

If it go cost my peace its an expensive shit don’t disturb me please ( I don’t know if I have captured it fresh but its from Adekunle Gold)

Back to the main story, I was easily moved to different spots, I used the same methods as they used some people before me to be gratify by the society or approved. I was so in pain when a person could outbeat me in something and I was super competitive just to be seen I’m present. I would have do anything just to be seen in a room full of People.

But have come to realise that when you’re not place to do something you’ll never find peace in what you do, disappointments will always be your portion.

Am I there yet no, why am I sharing then if am not there it’s just have come to learn you have to be open, to know that what you will always do no matter what scale it’s there will be a person doing bigger than you but yours is unique just because its done by you.

Never compare you with someone else and just know the aim of you is to have peace inside and not social gratification, that’s the main key keep that.

For there is a great reward in what you do alone and satisfied from inside than what you do and satisfy the societies around us. There is a great cost to satisfy a society than to satisfy yourself

Bless Up
Emitty

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graduate's depression knowledge life mentality and mental health season

Chillax,Graduate (parte v)

Will start today’s article with my all time fave hindi movie namely three idiots, when the imperial college principle was addressing the students, he said life is a race, you either run or get squashed.

That statement applies to us but for today am not talking about running and talking about tolerance, life is a race yea but if you live in daressalaam you it’s not a race. This is because there will always be a traffic jam some place always.

Am not from there but we usually see and hear of traffic jams and so on. So in traffic jams is where I would like to set my theme for today’s title tolerance. In life is not all about running but it’s about maintaining pace between what you had, who you are and who you want to be.

See the same person has a past, present and future now tolerance is how you live now with learnt experience of the past making or creating a better future that’s tolerance.

Am not conflict with the one who said the past is past or bygones be bygones what am saying is that let all the past be a learnt experience which will help you make moves today that are not from scratch but from a reference that will help you reach point in the future.

In a traffic jam there is always a slow/gradual movement towards the common place, in life that’s how we are some people maybe going fast in the route and you going slow it doesn’t matter what matters is your tolerance to wait to finish because even after the jam what’s next is a smooth ride to compensate wasted time…

Learn to take time and tolerate what is thrown at you..

Bless up
Emitty..

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Constructive thinking graduate's depression knowledge mentality and mental health season

Chillax, Graduate (partè III)

For the past days, we have been going through from my point of view what is the graduate depression, so far we covered two parts but today is what I call a masterpiece dive of what eats us more and more

The points are easy to spot but hard to accept, for some of us it’s easy to spot them while others are doing so but on our own life its very hard to accept that we have or we lack some qualities. Or accepting that the following are eating us up.

@Jay shetty and many more speakers have been speaking on timing and even the holy books are saying something about it always. We may live in the same planet we call earth that doesn’t mean we have to be confined in how other people live it, but to some of us(graduates and non-graduates) we always want to or tempted to be jealous of how others live their lives.

We start with a piece of story that will aim to conclude on my point of Comparison, a car driver wishes he could fly just because of the road traffic and the standard of life he want to achieve meanwhile a motorcycle driver envies the car driver just because of the comfortability of the car to the driver and the motorbike driver is sick of the hardship he always go through chest pains just because of him always opposing the weather, air or rain. But also a normal bicycle person wants a motorbike and normal person walking along the road want to have just a bicycle. And a cripple man wish he could just even walk..

See in life we always have wishes, some being in the reach of our efforts, some not. But there is a swahili saying “Mungu hakupi vyote, wala hakunyimi vyote”

see you may have something and the something is what you suppose to be grateful for. In correlation to the title non graduates envy the graduates while the graduates envy those in work places and those working always want something that will let them stand on the own with the slogan being your own boss…

See we always are unsatisfied with the life we have, you may find someone with everything but still unhappy because s/he feels something is missing and so do everyone. We feel like we need something someone who is in front has. But we never understand that we all have our fixed destinies greater than what we are hoping for..

According to me there are types of comparison If not two there three of them.

1. Comparison set by the society against you.
2. Comparison of you against somebody else
3. Comparison of beliefs…

So let’s meet for part four to go with the types of comparison from the point of view of graduates

Bless up
Emitty.

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