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changes Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

Life = love + life

The Life, Love, and Leveling Up of an individuals
For most of us, it’s no secret that love conquers all. It makes life worth living—and it even lights up those dark corners of our hearts. But for those who are experiencing a difficult time in their relationship, the difficulties might be just what the doctor ordered — and not the end of the world. The truth is, most relationships don’t pan out as planned. And for those who do have a successful outcome, it’s often because they weren’t meant to be. In this article, we explore the six pillars of love: what they are and how to cultivate them in your life.

What is love?
Simply put, love is a feeling. It’s not a word, a concept, or even a thought. It’s an action. And the action is to connect with the one you love, no matter who that person is — whether that person is your spouse, your best friend, or your colleague. It’s to make space for them in your heart, mind, and calendar.

How to have love
To have love, you must have love. That’s it. That’s the entire situation. You don’t have to do anything else. It doesn’t matter if you spend your free time alone or with a partner — the very fact that you’re connected to another person makes you feel love.

Why do people have love?
There are two main factors that lead to the development of love. The first is mutual respect for one another. This is the foundation of any relationship. If someone doesn’t respect you — or, at the very least, doesn’t seem to appreciate what you have — then there’s no chance in hell of having love.

How to cultivate it in your life
There are a few ways to get your heart rate pumping and your mind thinking like an individual. It starts by choosing to love yourself first. Once you’ve validated that you are healthy and happy — then, it’s on to the question of how to love your partner. Here are a few ways to start: Express your love for yourself. Create a photo album with your love for yourself. Share it with anyone who’ll listen. Get involved in extracurricular activities or charitable causes that support your interests. Whatever it takes, make yourself happy. Improve your relationship with your partner. Spend more time together; read, write, and interact with each other; be more sensitive to one another’s needs; and show up more as a team.

Bottom line
Now that you’ve explored the six pillars of love, what are you waiting for? Start being you! When someone doesn’t love you back, it automatically suggests that they don’t want to be with you. That means it — and the challenges that come with it — are real. You’re not alone. The people in your life who struggle are the ones who need to connect with themselves and validate that they love themselves. Keep in mind that it’s okay to be imperfect — because being imperfect is who you are. And while you may feel bad for the way that you feel sometimes, it doesn’t mean that you have to put up with unfair or negative treatment from other people. In fact, that kind of behavior towards others can lead to feelings of inadequacy and self-blame. So, instead of feeling shame or shamefacedness, just realize that you’re just naturally attracted to those who you think have what you want in life — and who you think you can please. The more you connect with yourself and validate that you love yourself, the easier it will be for you to connect with your partner. Eventually, something will grow between you two and you’ll know you’re meant to be together.

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

Work for it.

Well I was opportune to travel to a certain city for a team capacity building and the travelling was fine, but my task was with the media committee..

Well pre the training we had to set some stationeries to be used inside the training, example the training banner, notepads, name tags and even the layout for some templates for the training.

Then the issue of coverage and photo and memories keeping we needed a camera. Well the process was at first easy since I and the team were to move to a different region it would have been logical to go get a camera from the place we were going..

Well that wasn’t the best idea well the best move was us moving with our tools but we didn’t and that was fine at first . 

They say if you fail to prepare you prepare to fail, and that’s what happened, see we thought that it would be easy to get equipments just because once we had a project in that region and we were able to acquire equipments, little did we know that time is a varying factor ..

We failed to acquire equipments not because we didn’t have money to rent it but just because we didn’t have the right people to sign off as collateral for us to get it..

We even tried putting our items on bond but it didn’t  work out.. THAT’S A WORLD LESSON RIGHT HERE.

See its not what you have,it’s what people have on you. Some people have blackmail abilities just because what they have on you is too much for the world around you to know.

But let’s talk about TRUST, they failed to rent out the equipments we want just because they didn’t trust us, even though the one that sent us to the place knew the place but they fail to give us the equipments just because they didn’t trust us.

Trust is something we have to work for. You can’t just build trust out of the blues, we have to work for it..

How many times have we work for something in our lives ? What was that one thing you wanted on spot and failed to get it until you had to work for it..

Just as trust is, some other abstract concepts in life you’ve to work alot in life. That’s what is required. We have to work for it, nothing comes easy in life, easy is bad.

Bless up
Emitty

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changes Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

Build or Break

build (/bɪld/)
construct (something) by putting parts or material together.

Similar: construct, erect, put up, assemble, set up, raise, make, fabricate, form, manufacture, create, fashion, model, mould, shape, forge, knock together

Opposite: demolish, destroy,

make stronger or more intense.
“we built up confidence in our abilities”

Similar: boost, strengthen, increase, improve, invigorate, augment, raise, intensify, enhance, escalate, multiply, swell, beef up

the proportions of a person’s or animal’s body.
“she was of medium height and slim build”

Similar: physique, frame, body, figure,form, structure, shape, make-up, formation

All the above is inspired by a line of statement on a very good lovely friend I have, build or break that she wrote on her timeline.

In life we get alot of things that troubles us, I can share what I go through or even If we had a dialogue of what you going through honestly without any secrecy,I know I’ll hear alot from you.

Let’s not talk about that but what you go through can either BUILD or BREAK.

In college, there is an allowance offered by the government to students and most of the students are given the same amount of money for the whole semester. The money comes into two portion.

Most of us we are facing the financial balance difficulties but what makes us going is the fact that there is next time in two months and you’ll get money.

The situation of waiting builds  most of us into a stage of planning and placing of budget so that when the money comes it will be effectively. That’s to most of us

But in life everything may be off balance and everything hitting you may seem new to you and you thinking that everything is after you to break you..

Financial problems, health issues, social troubles,spiritual difficulties and many more these are many in the list of things that can really question  your mentality and make you feel broken. 

They say anything that doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, that’s what we should take out of any situation, we are here not for a smooth life, but to be tested and to know our limits.

Inorder to live and reach the point to know our capabilities we have to undergo the processes that will break us into ways we can’t even understand, but it’s in these situations we learn to build ourselves up better and stronger.

The good book says, no challenge comes to you too heavy for you to handle,  and through every challenge there is an exit. We need to build ourselves through challenges.

For the challenges are there to stay, they can’t go away all by them selves but through solving them. Just like building a LEGO one block at a time, so is the same as tackling challenges one problem at a time..

Bless up
Emitty…

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changes Constructive thinking knowledge life & sports mentality and mental health

Defined

School life has never been easy to some of us if not all of us,to the rest of us school has been a battleground constantly fighting. Whether for grades or social bonding, it was and still is a fight.

Well the true fight comes on mastering your lecturer or teacher, his or her approaches the likes and the dislikes that’s where things becomes hasty..

Well a short story was, and I know this is common having that one teacher each semester wanting you answering questions just has s/he has teacher a line by line word to word..

Well if he defined something as A you can’t write it as small “a” and expecting to score a mark from him or her. Inorder to pass his or her module we have to abide and go a word to word with what s/he has offered.

In life we face similar situations, I call it playing dumb, we tend to know what’s right and what’s not right but we still find ourselves living line by line and word to word.

In parallel with their definition of what we are, what we should be and even what we should do and how we should behave, and we find it okay thinking that we can’t do anything about it even if we try..

We are scared to break toxic routine just because of what has been predefined on us by others. Well am not a teacher or lecturer to tell you that you need to overcome that.

But just know even in school the best things or knowledge that sticks out in our mind is always the one that we have defined ourselves .

So it’s easier to make a further step forward with our own definition of routine, what we are, who we are and where we are going and at what pace we are moving. We have to refine the definition that are set on us…

Bless up
Emitty

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changes Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

Who’s fault is it

Its another beautiful morning today. I thank God for giving the grace of attending the first service today. So when was on my way back home I was just walking along the road then over a sudden a guy from behind me just greeted, “Hi”. I had to turn back to know who that person was, it was a guy a know, just a guy around the neighborhood and I hied back to him. As we were walking the guy was smoking and I was like it’s so too early for him to be doing this, this was just in my head. So I had to ask him what’s the benefit of that he replied “it has no benefits honestly and I can’t stop smoking ” I was like “ooh really” then he said ” I got this friends of mine who taught me how to but I now wonder that they ain’t smoking anymore” and I told him so why can’t you stop and be just like them “No I can’t stop I just can’t” , do you know how bad it is for your health especially your lungs “Yes, nicotine I what I get from this and I can’t stop, it’s satan who is making me” and I was like whoa whoa whoa man hold it there satan! Are you for real? so Satan is the one who made you do this. You know you really don’t have to blame Satan in any of this because you are the who made such a decision to get to where you are now and to what you are doing right now

What am I trying to say here is

many of us have been blaming satan for the mistakes we do or for situations we get ourselves in and we be like it’s satan who made me do this on the contrary it’s been our fault all way long we get to decide without thinking of what the outcome would be. So sometimes we just have seat and look back to where we made it go wrong and get to fix it than just saying the statement it’s Satan who made me do this

You have a great day. Bless up

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changes Constructive thinking knowledge mentality and mental health season

Purposely Placed

I don’t know how to put this but before, when what I was seeking was social approval, instant gratification and peace from people around, life was tough, how?

Before we head there, ” let me place this what determines your peace determines your sadness and your level of disappointment – Pst Steven Furtick” In simple words where you place your happiness is where disappointment happens and also source of problems.

If it go cost my peace its an expensive shit don’t disturb me please ( I don’t know if I have captured it fresh but its from Adekunle Gold)

Back to the main story, I was easily moved to different spots, I used the same methods as they used some people before me to be gratify by the society or approved. I was so in pain when a person could outbeat me in something and I was super competitive just to be seen I’m present. I would have do anything just to be seen in a room full of People.

But have come to realise that when you’re not place to do something you’ll never find peace in what you do, disappointments will always be your portion.

Am I there yet no, why am I sharing then if am not there it’s just have come to learn you have to be open, to know that what you will always do no matter what scale it’s there will be a person doing bigger than you but yours is unique just because its done by you.

Never compare you with someone else and just know the aim of you is to have peace inside and not social gratification, that’s the main key keep that.

For there is a great reward in what you do alone and satisfied from inside than what you do and satisfy the societies around us. There is a great cost to satisfy a society than to satisfy yourself

Bless Up
Emitty

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changes Constructive thinking knowledge life mentality and mental health

As He teaches

Back in my primary school I remember my grammar school teacher usually had us Energize with some opposites of words.

He would have the class stand up and pick one at random then he starts by saying you what is the opposite of this and that and you’ll earn a seat when you answer the questions

Well back then we hated it and we usually didn’t raise our hands to answer the questions hoping the teacher will get bored and run out of words to ask us. But ooh boy that man had stamina he was always on the clock and he had alot of words for us to answer

So right now I don’t use any opposite in my life or neither do i use the grammar 100% but what I know today i can reflect in alot of lessons that can be derived from the quick stand up.

Some notable guidelines to some lessons are as follow.
1. Expecting the teacher to come and ask questions. See in life we are always in a surprise mode, but so far people are in a stage they even say for the point that life has thrown so much shades on me I can’t be surprised no more. This is not that s/he has gone through it all but it’s that s/he has gone through alot . Alot people of have a hidden story to tell. And all the stories mah all have a same beginning “it was out of no were, I didn’t plan this or I didn’t plan that but it happens and till it happens like that it means that if you didn’t plan for it then you had a different plan and that the opposite happened…
2. Our response some early they raise their hands but some of us we dont. The early response are similar to the way we live our lives some opportunities are randomly popin up always but its some few that make that fast decision and others will take time to take them but others will not take the opportunities at all that’s life. We waited for the teacher but some of us had already sat down earlier…
3. Hope and expectation for him to get bored. I really dont know if this has ever hit you up, you starting feeling a little left out want to life just pass you by, feeling like you’re the only one alone in this whole life passing a certain situation and life cant Get any worse than it was. You hope life will get bored and start being nice to you? If you’re in this just know life never get bored throwing shade its just mother nature making us hard and resilient to its methods.
4. Stamina for his consistency,life will always show you consistency more and more and it will always disappoint us, so life has the teacher’s consistency to throw shades. There is a trending statement good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people that’s nature the way to build the boldness out of ourselves.
5. Answers given. Whether we were asked the first round or last every question that the teacher had asked had answers so as life no matter what you going through, nonmatter tough,easy, crazy, logical or illogical then just know, no matter what time is threw at you it has an answer..
6. Topic on the table. The teacher had always had a particular theme he used while asking a question and we would have to tune ourselves into answering the particular theme that was very easy simply because the questions were easily predictable after the theme was known. So in life trying figure what wave to flow with in times of your greatest conflict..

I was told a good teacher teaches how the real world works on his lessons without even saying so, and by reflecting this it has clearly shown me that the teacher planted something positive in the lessons he taught..

Bless up
Emitty

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Constructive thinking graduate's depression knowledge mentality and mental health season

Chillax, Graduate (partè III)

For the past days, we have been going through from my point of view what is the graduate depression, so far we covered two parts but today is what I call a masterpiece dive of what eats us more and more

The points are easy to spot but hard to accept, for some of us it’s easy to spot them while others are doing so but on our own life its very hard to accept that we have or we lack some qualities. Or accepting that the following are eating us up.

@Jay shetty and many more speakers have been speaking on timing and even the holy books are saying something about it always. We may live in the same planet we call earth that doesn’t mean we have to be confined in how other people live it, but to some of us(graduates and non-graduates) we always want to or tempted to be jealous of how others live their lives.

We start with a piece of story that will aim to conclude on my point of Comparison, a car driver wishes he could fly just because of the road traffic and the standard of life he want to achieve meanwhile a motorcycle driver envies the car driver just because of the comfortability of the car to the driver and the motorbike driver is sick of the hardship he always go through chest pains just because of him always opposing the weather, air or rain. But also a normal bicycle person wants a motorbike and normal person walking along the road want to have just a bicycle. And a cripple man wish he could just even walk..

See in life we always have wishes, some being in the reach of our efforts, some not. But there is a swahili saying “Mungu hakupi vyote, wala hakunyimi vyote”

see you may have something and the something is what you suppose to be grateful for. In correlation to the title non graduates envy the graduates while the graduates envy those in work places and those working always want something that will let them stand on the own with the slogan being your own boss…

See we always are unsatisfied with the life we have, you may find someone with everything but still unhappy because s/he feels something is missing and so do everyone. We feel like we need something someone who is in front has. But we never understand that we all have our fixed destinies greater than what we are hoping for..

According to me there are types of comparison If not two there three of them.

1. Comparison set by the society against you.
2. Comparison of you against somebody else
3. Comparison of beliefs…

So let’s meet for part four to go with the types of comparison from the point of view of graduates

Bless up
Emitty.

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changes graduate's depression life mentality and mental health

Chillax,Graduate. (Parte II)

We live in a world were everything is memelized, a world were everyone is a meme lord or meme queen, it’s not a bad thing. So why am i bringing this to your attention.

It fits the illustrations for parte II of the 2021 graduate depression, some memes are funny but explain everything in plain language and fewer words. I wish I could show you all memes have seen but just take a few.

One in a particular occasion if I remember said relax life is too short to commit suicide we all die. With relation to graduate depression, it’s very easy for a graduate nowadays to run to commit suicide just because of impatience.

We seek instant gratification, some memes show some skeletons and it will be seen written at age of 25 a graduate places himself/herself stating I will have a job, and house with a car, while the skeletons playing the role of ancestors. ( I recalled the story of the old man and the bamboo tree plantation that took 5years to just come out of the ground.)

What makes us depressed is hoping or finishing school and hopping everything falls in place just as we get out, to some it does happen like that but a larger number it doesn’t come out like that..

What also makes us depressed is too much thinking of what tomorrow holds ” nothing eats us more than think of tomorrow, the thinking of tomorrow is fine but overthinking robs us of the present.” Most of graduates end up messing up the last semester because their minds are all set for the end but they forget that they can’t have tomorrow perfectly if they dont have a best today…

It’s not a meme but I was in class somedays back and the lecturer was teaching on the multimedia technologies team, where he said there many people that are always involved in the production of some things, eg movies and even animations.

A student raised a voice and said what is wrong with our side, multimedia products why are they so poor in production is it the team problem.

The lecturer answered the point is and will always be the same reasons across our nation, we seek instant gratification over quality work we find want to be in the market with alot of poor works instead of having a perfect work speaking and branding us. The works are alot in the market but they just shout nothing to offer

He continued by saying why do we eat ugali, rice and boiled vegetables its because we hate waiting and the habit has brought us impatience that it’s either we can’t see something through or we fast forward it.

Its always been the logical universal rule, good things takes time . If you fail to enjoy the process you are doomed to depress over slow motion of your progress.

Coming up next on part III: Comparison, company and tolerance

Part II
Bless up
Emitty

Categories
graduate's depression knowledge life mentality and mental health

Chill,Graduate. (Parte I)

The problem starts with the point of views, as you grow up the point of views change.

Have you asked yourself why as you grow and your grades become simpler but hard to get, well ask a kid what’s his or her grade in grade I or II, you’ll find out that it ranges over 90-100. That’s very normal.

As time goes on the idea of grades start to fall and this is okay to us, but hard to our parents and guardians.

They get unpleased with our fall in grades, to such a point that we force ourselves to fit in their dreams.

Case I: Scenarios to many people that are on my circle start when they are passionate with something else and forced to study with something else, the bad thing is that you grow accepting what you are doing without loving it, just to satisfy your guardians. In the long run when it comes to stand on your own you’re clouded with the feeling that it wasn’t your decision so you dont have to struggle hard to get a job, just to show them the I TOLD YOU SO FACE…

Case II: too much expectation Previous love with a certain hobby but as time goes on your hobbies are gone, you develop new interest but you find yourself in confusion simply because your hobbies made you make a choice that by the time you realise it can’t be change you’re already late. And thus when you’re done studying for you have nothing but hate and useless certification.

Case III: Our guardians definition of how life is in the university against our real life that we live. The point of views change, education system change and the education system is a fixed deduction system, what I mean is that its created to force people out, I did a piece about our education system

But also today I was reading a system whereby the life at school and university doesn’t match the real life situations and hence it’s hard for us graduates and students to adopt a new lifestyle over 21 years or 18years developed habits created by studying ..

The 18-21 years are the years that we spend in school. And the years are covered by hectic assignments, teachers and students beefs, unsupportive circle and fear of real world ..


Part 1
Bless up
Emitty

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