Category: Constructive thinking

Categories
Constructive thinking graduate's depression knowledge life mentality and mental health

The Beginning

well let’s take it from the start with a simple scenario based on true story.

growing up is never been and will never be easy. we all have some stories of growth and all these stories shapes us into what we are right now.

we were raised either to work by fear or delegating work thinking we are able to do so. formation of classes started here people who are scared to make moves thinking they cant due to fear and another class of ruthless 

we grew up not knowing what to do what if our ideas were listened and taken to consideration, so we created a wall that’s fear of rejection, we won’t make a move because we are scared to be turned down. We were trained that we only have to listen to people who are older to us.

with even advancement of technology we trying to cope with it, will be noted as hooliganism, moral degraded and visionless teen. this has created a wall of anticipation, we see all chances offered are scams and aint aiming for us to take them.

we grow up socializing, making bonds with people and we do things together thinking it will always be like that, but it doesn’t appear that way we create comfort in people while we in school not knowing that we won’t stuck with them always  after school or college we are left alone. Mob isn’t a team, its a temporary gathering that has come into place for a short period of time.

depression can’t be caused suddenly but it’s built slowly slowly as time goes. i can’t treat depression but you can always share whats bothering you. stop piling what’s in your heart..

Bless up
Emitty

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life season

We Are Trees II

I know you don’t care but yes i was on a bus while writing this piece and what i recall was my biology class while I was thinking of what the education that I have and how i apply it to the real world.

I recall my biology teacher came in class and started to teach about transpiration and plants ways to do regulation and the terms i remember are like osmoregulation

Now there are four seasons which are summer, winter , autumn and spring. i don’t know much about the weather and that will be geography now.

but this seasons have a specific time or period to take into effect. And during dry season the trees shades it leaves to allow it’s existence to continue.

it’s the only way that it can ensure it total survival. plant losses water through small holes by means of transpiration. blah blah science . All these learnt at school..

in times like dry season the tree shades it’s leaves complete and after while starts afresh.

All these got me thinking of our lives some times we are trees and sometimes we fail to be like trees. we hold on to people draining and undermining our ability, we hold on to toxic people. we hold on to them in the name of not destroying a friendship built for long time.

we hold on to them afraid of starting a fresh with new people. what we hold will surely be the death of us. we should understand that there people in seasons and most of the people we have are just leaves on a big tree.

For our survival we need to let some people that are merely just leaves on a tree to fall off…

what kind of people am i trying to say to you to let them off. Friends that can’t place your name in a room full of opportunity, friends that leave in moment of need, friends who hold you back from success, friend who discourages you not to reach your full potential.

summing it up trees are not told that it’s time to shade off or its time to grow again. they understand their environment and so do we, we are supposed to understand our environment we should know when to grow new friends and when to shade some old friends..

Bless Up
Emitty

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life season

Lower Your Expectations

Getting excited for a promise,
waiting for a specific date to do something special, waiting for results that you don’t know what they will be like and even hoping for positive feedback on something. Those all we can call them expectations.

Today let’s talk about expectations and place what we do know about it.

Everybody can wait on something its a matter of patience and we will talk about patience some other time. waiting is easy but anxiously waiting is hard. we all have troubles when we want or when we are expecting something to happen.

why ?? i don’t know your reasons but let me put one point here.

mostly when you are expecting something its like a promise made and usually promises are valuable when given to a person who hasn’t got the offer, we promise stuff inorder for it to be valuable and worth a promise it is supposed to be something new or a replacement of present stuff.

what it’s meant here is if you’re promised lets say a car, it has to be either of the following. You don’t have the car so you going to get a car or you have a car but you’re going to be replaced with a new one.

now getting something that you don’t have is exciting and causes unsettled emotions. When you’re expecting something you make believe to your heart that you already have the promise. And in return the heart it visualizes that you have it and you are using it this creates what we call (mazoea)  now after building that up its hard to break them .

Now with high expectations comes  great disappointment, if you raise your excitement level without working on the issue effectively to make it happen it will never come true.

Life is always like that if you raise your expectations it will raise its disappointing level… stay positive but not excited work on it so it will true.

Bless Up

Emitty

Categories
changes Constructive thinking festivity knowledge life season

What You Eat

In a restaurant or grocery there will always be a list of food, we can order all but we don’t. we decide to pick some and eat then leave.

There are a lot ot menus in the world, what I mean is there are a lot of foods to eat and to be cooked and they can all be cooked under different techniques to raise different taste.

we all have different taste on our cuisine. The foods used in one part of the globe can be different from the other part of the globe.

we can eat all that if we decide too, but we sometimes have placed standard on what we eat and what we don’t .

In real life we can say the information around the globe is the food we choose on eating or taste. there are a lot of information going around us. we can’t eat all the information That’s out there what we can do is choose the quantity of what we eat and even decided on what not to eat.

we luck standards of what we digest any information we digest on it without processing the depth of it.

we should accept that not every information out there is for us to take in and process it. not everything we hear are ours to process, many relationship and stable connection are cancelled or die due to what we hear and decide to process. Be careful with the information that goes around you.

We live in a world that we eat what is around us , digest it no matter how  and release it

Bless Up. Emitty

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life season

Reference Theorem

You have seen a CV or written one yes ? if so then lets move together on this one.

Read a book and at the end pages you have seen the reference chapter. Yes i take it. Lets move on again!!.

Most of us have what we call models , role model, mentors, councillors and coaches. people that we seek advice and we guidance we term them as oracles or point of view to some real time event and situation.

Okay, while growing up i heard some kids and even adults been kept on check by the reference theorem.

Reference theorem; we can put it as the usage of a comparison or a guidance point. while growing up now our parents made us see and feel that all we can achieve is supposed to be as equivalent to some people who have advanced more than us a single step or more steps ahead of us.

Parents were heard saying you should be ashamed of yourself for doing the opposite of what they had wanted, “look at somebody (the reference) s/he has done a, b, c and d and s/he has a lot and been successful“.

Some of us have been affected with this and we live our whole life thinking we can’t go alone or be our own guide because all our lives have been threatened with other people’s success being rubbed on our Face.
(Angalia mtoto wa mama fulani unaona kasoma hichi kafaulu ).

I’m not here to say its bad to have a point of reference rather to state that; we have to be careful with how we throw ourselves out there towards our references.

I once said “lets live by lessons learnt
not by reference and examples”.

Sometimes we undermine the abilities we have by just minimizing our capabilities through overlooking at them we call references.

Live while understanding the lessons hidden in your struggles but not what somebody else did or does in the same struggles.”

We should have people of reference for learning purposes only. What I mean is that no problem is ever new, so the way people ahead of us have faced them but had a different manifestation from ours we should understand that they solved them differently, but never force what our paths to be as theirs.

Life is always a piece of everything you experience never let the piece that you pick from some point be the masterpiece of your story. Take it as a piece and not a masterpiece.

Never force your path on someone’s path. Love your struggles and they will loosen up for ya.

Bless Up
Emitty

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life season

When to Pay

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

If someone asks me, whats my take on life in terms of what we do and what we don’t do i would reply as follows

Everyone has used public transport here as in Tanzania that’s the common means of transportation and it has taken and employed a lot of people.

Now in public transport there will always be the driver and bus conductor and all of em sometimes we don’t know them.

And the means of collecting of the bus fare the bus conductor chooses whether to collect it in the beginning of the trip, middle of the trip or at the last stop of every passenger on the car..

Now, these are all cases of life one we sometimes don’t know our driving forces or at what time life will demand our potential at first.

We all forged in the first place with potentials that are hidden inside and we just wait until the bus conductor demands the fare.

All we have is that we have to accept that we are on a bus called life and at any point in our travel it will come around asking for what we are doing in the bus for ( the purpose of our being in ) the sole reason for our existence.

It’s within our power to agree that we all have destinations and we all have different lengths in our trip.

The driving force of our lives is not yet and somehow not knowing the driver.

Ever wondered what is my take when we don’t have enough but its necessary to take a bus with low cash on you ??? well next time.

Till then your life is full of scenarios that its best not questioning them but living them like it . for we don’t know what may come in front…

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life season

Mind Your Standards

A Swahili line said “Usiwe kama jogoo akidhani kunakucha ili yeye tu Awike ” Translated to Don’t be like a cock thinking that the sun only rises for it to crow.

We say we have taste on different things, the taste we have are what we can call standards.

Life, aiiiiiiiii, Life has funny ways to prove us wrong and mostly it proves us wrong on what we have or what we are surrounded with. we put so much faith on what we have and we also put less faith sometimes from what we have too.

The first thing that life uses to prove us wrong is people, friends and family. We put standards due to our preference and taste we have undermine or underestimate people you meet, stay with, friends and even family. How many times have we been disappointed or been amazed by the people around us?

We judge, despise, humiliate, laugh at, criticize and hate in the name of standards. These standards have create a blurry vision of making our selves righteous in-front of those who we have not give them chance to explain or prove them selves. we feel it’s right to do so but it’s not.

The funny thing about the standards we put on people are first way up and off the charts unreasonable. Second the standards we keep are not known to people, people fail to understand what we want from them or what they should do or how to interact with us.

A perfect example of what am saying is ever find a person angry with another person simply because the other person has not texted or call? The standard here place by the person is that the other person is responsible for finding them.

While the sad reality is You miss a person text or call never wait, you love a person tell them, you need something ask.

By doing so meaning by judging, despise, humiliate, laugh at, criticize and hate we be like a cock and in our case we think we are a 100% perfect in-front of others.

Life does not work that way, we can’t live by putting standards that are not known we are all in a small circle called the globe with a lot of things in it. Don’t complicate life by adding more on the list and making headline to people’s problems

Eid – Mubarak

Bless up

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life season

Sometime Let Go

Take a lesson from trees and its seasons

Come think of it our lives are similar or based on the life season of a tree, the benefits that a tree gives to the environment is the same as what we give to the surrounding. I am not saying you’re a tree but you can be and you should be a tree. Follow the season or life span of the tree. Simply because there are common traits we can relate from the life of a tree

The basic importance of the trees are many but some they give fruits, shades and give fresh air to the environment. Trees are very important to the earth since they give shades Some people find comfort not only to stay or have a person as a go-to person but some even secret keeper, soulmates, BFF – blessed friends forever, and more. These are basically the trees that offer shade, they provide comfort

Gives fresh air to the surrounding. Some people find wisdom and even great teachings from various people we call them personal trainers, guru, mentors, and life coaches. We are ready to settle down and listen to them for hours. They are considered trees that give fresh air.

Some trees provide fruits. Remember few posts back (https://bsafrique.home.blog/2020/04/20/realise-your-potential) we talked of a seed, just as tree comes from seeds that they have died and come out from the ground and hustled to bear fruits. The whole process is not a thing to see overnight but the process is for a long time

Now the tree teaches us the patience that what we are building now, the work or the things we do now are not a guarantee of overnight success, we normally think that there are shortcuts to success and we rush to take an easy way out of which there is no easy way out. Success starts from scratch just as the seed goes to the ground dies and starts growing from the dead seed. And you are in a corner lamenting why things are not moving it’s because that the seed you planted is on the stage of dying so it can start one.

You are a tree to someone either they are looking at you for shade or fruits, you are a tree. You are a solution to someone else your hard work will be the fruits we are talking about to your kids, parents, and even society. You preach about change and you are just there doing nothing. You’re a tree we want fruits from you. Be the change you want to see.

Sometimes the trees shade their leaves. This is an important concept that I want to run by you today. You as a tree it will reach a time that the fruits that you make have to fall off and even the leaves (People who are around you or you surround yourself with) sometimes you have to let them Go, detach yourself from them, for every season it comes you have to update your circle some people if they stick with you or you hold yourself to them they will drain you up and you will fail to survive the change of the season ahead of you.

Be careful with what you carry for leaves and what you bear as fruits, the fruits you bear now are the result of what you handled your self to stir them up the way the will or have become or come. Lamenting is a word in a dictionary of losers the way you are right now is a perfect role model picture for someone. Someone is looking up to you so never give up.

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life season

What do people say of who you are

What kind of face do people see you in

When one needs to get a job he or she gets to prepare a very good CV that will convince the employer to have them employed. Apart from the career CVs that we fight for to make them better to get our jobs we do not have to forget that we have our life CVs as well to create.

Have you ever got to ask yourself on what people say about you, talk of you, see you? What kind of face are you seen In by the people around you, society,friends,family? What kind of CV are you writing or preparing for them to talk good of ?

We struggle creating good CVs for our careers but we forget that we also need to create good CVs in our lifes too. The good Book says “it’s better a good name than a good scent”. So what name are you making, what face are you trying to show to people. Is it that one which every one gets to point fingers on you, despise you and speak.bad of you or is it that one which people get to speak good of you and get to create or make a good reputation in front and to everyone around you.

Lets take an example of you dying today, imagine yourself attending your own funeral, you get see people crying, sobbing, people in pain just bcoz you are gone. When it reaches that time when they get to start reading or saying about you, what would you like to hear, as a daughter or son, nephew or niece, husband or wife, friend, work partner, what would you want to hear from them saying of you? All this is prepared here, now right this moment with whoever you are with, the way you live with them, talk to them, help them, take them with their weaknesses,deal with them so on and so forth. This kind of CV is worth living, create one to live a good memory. Live by creating that face or name or CV to be remembered and not forgotten. You’ll still get to live after leaving.

Bless up.

Categories
changes Constructive thinking knowledge life season

How do you get to value the gift given

is it right for the gift giver to ask you on the use of the gift given to you?

Let me start with these two short stories.

Once upon a time there were two friends who used to live together as family. One day Andrew told Adrian that he will be taking a trip to the US. Adrian was so happy for his fellow. So the day came and Andrew left for the US. Days and weeks and months passed, Andrew remembered his friend Adrian and sent him a gift. He sent him a very beautiful woolen jacket. Adrian received the jacket and was so happy. After two years of Andrew’s stay in the US he decided to come back home. The day he got back he saw his friend and was happy to be back home again. He then asked Adrian, where is the jacket I sent you as a gift? In a glimpse of suprise Andrew saw the jacket at the dog’s kennel it being used to give warmth to those dogs. Andrew got disappointed and said nothing about it and he went inside.

I hope we getting something here

Story 2

In the middle of the great lahulu forest lived a family, a husband and his pregnant wife in a very big tree house. It did not take time, the wife gave birth to a handsome baby boy(gift of life). They were so happy to have the baby with them. One night while they were sleeping they were attacked by the dangerous animal forests. The husband tried his best to keep his family but he failed, he was eaten and the wife too but the baby survived the attack. After that night of the attack, very early in the morning there were hunters who were passing by and heard the baby cry,they asked themselves where is that cry coming from, when they looked up they saw a tree house. Two of the men climbed in and saw the little baby crying and helpless. They took him and decided to stay with him, raised him to a very strong young man. After few years the boy started acting strange, he suddenly turned to a robber,robbing people’s things in the community where he was raised and in the end he got killed with angry people in that society.

What do we get to learn from these two stories.

The first story tells us about a woolen jacket given to Adrian and it was turned to a warmth keeper for dogs. Try keeping yourself in Andrew’s shoes, if it were you how would you feel? The expense and the time you used to get him the jacket was never valued.

The second story, the baby boy who was born was given a gift of life but where did he end? Being a robber. Ghaaii this hurts. You are given life and get to misuse it. The good book says that God created us so as we can worship Him, apart from that He created us to take possession of everything that’s on this Earth. If He gifted us life to do so, then why we turn to be bad people? Why we turn to be people who are disgrace to families, society and to the whole world? You are given life to live, enjoy and use what you are given to bless others.

Get to ask yourself today, do you get tot value the gift you are given? Let’s get to treasure what’s gifted for us,as we do so we get to open more doors for more goods to come and we get to bless the hearts of those who give the gifts to us.

Bless up

Design a site like this with WordPress.com
Get started